I think my vagina is haunted
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
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