By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Randomize