How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
last night I used snow as a chaser
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