Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
