I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
