try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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