I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
