peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
