he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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