FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
