people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
