So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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