lets start a swedish sibling band together
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
