I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
