the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
In other news, I just burned my penis
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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