are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
They are going to name an STD after you.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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