bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
