Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
