We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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