How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
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