i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
