If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
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