i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Randomize
