that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
