his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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