There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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