just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Boobs speak an international language.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize
