road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
