NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
