I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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