Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
