the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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