You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
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