She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
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