I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
