Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
