She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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