The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Just invented taco cereal.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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