just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
