I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
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