I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
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