So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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