New invention idea: vibrating tampons
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
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