Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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