end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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