You're completely useless in the revolution.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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