I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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