You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
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