i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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