Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
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