Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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