Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
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