No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize