we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
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